Our Conquering Lion

The Conquering Lion
Shall break every chain
He will wipe every tear away
He will take all my hurt and pain
Conquering Lion
Shall break every chain
He will wipe every tear away
He will take all my hurt and pain
He will lead me to springs of living water
He will lead me to springs of living water
He will lead me to springs of living water

I wrote about this song in this post a long time ago, the day Olivia died. I have been thinking about her daily lately. I'm not sure why. My heart misses her and I get overwhelmed with thoughts of her and the pain of not having her here to call, spend a weekend with, laugh with, shop with, dream with, pray with and share my heart with. I visited her myspace page tonight searching for anything new I could find, something I didn't know. I want to know something knew about her. Maybe its that I wish she could share new pictures or blogs, if I could find something new, I would still have her here. I don't think any of this makes any logical sense but inside me it does. I want to read something new or see somthing new about her so I can hang on, not loose my thoughts and memories of her! I decided to listen to this song again, Conquering Lion by Grace Faulkner ( itunes it), nervous because I knew it would bring tears. I immediately go back to that late Saturday night in Olivia's room the week before she died. Marisa, Shana, Samantha and i were in her dark room, praying for Liv, begging the Lord for her life on this earth to last longer. This song came on and we just sang it to her. It was such a sweet time and I just want to transport back to that place, sit a little longer, laugh with Liv a little more and enjoy the sweetness of friends holding each other up. I am so thankful for the gift of friendship, what an amazing gift from God! As I listened to this song tonight I was reminded of my own brokeness, I don't have cancer and I am physically healthy, but my heart is sinful, its broken. Jesus has taken that, he has died so that I can live. He has willingly taken on the burden of my sin, my pride, jealousy and bitterness so that I can choose to walk free, no more bondage. I have the choice to walk in the freedom that His brutal death on the cross provides me.
The Lord is teaching me a lot about the condition of my own heart and its tough, I'll be honest, it makes me angry. I have to deal with the reality that I am sinful, its how I was born. There is no room to blame anyone for my feelings, actions, etc; I must take responsibility.
Its this process He is taking me on that will allow me to lay down these dirty, sinful actions and feeling of mine, He's taking me to springs of living water. Its a daily process, not a quick say one prayer event! I mean I know that years ago when I decided to believe in Jesus, I became His, saved but knowing Him, becoming like Him and walking in a way which is glorifying to Him is a process!
I hope you find encouragement in knowing that He is the ultimate Conquering Lion, He will break every chain and wipe all your tears away and take all your hurt and pain! He will be lead us to springs of living water...but it will be a journey! He is so faithful! Thank you Jesus!

Update

Mostly I just felt the need to update so...here goes:
*John has been wearing an arm brace since last week. The Dr. wanted to put him in a full blown cast but John refused...I know, totally not like John- ha! ;-). His thumb has been hurting for several months and he finally went in to get it checked out. Its either tendonitis or the gout...?? He has been very humbled through wearing the brace as it is an extremely minor annoyance. Let me explain: On Sunday we met a girl who was only supposed to live until October and she has probably the most extreme prognosis I have ever heard of. I don't want to give to many details because I do not have her permission to write about it but it definitely put lots of things into perspective in our life that day! It also reminded me of Olivia! This girl is 22, younger than Liv but just as joyful and ready to serve as Olivia and she seemed determined to not let this awful illness get in the way of letting Christ use her. Jesus has obviously worked in her life in transforming ways!
*I am taking care of 4 children this summer, it should be lots of fun and lots of practice ;-)
*We have also invited a girl to live with us for a few months. She is getting married this fall to a guy on staff. She will be moving in at the end of this month and I think it will be a great few months. She can get a peek into marriage life- ha!
*I had an interview with a Denton school yesterday and should know by the end of the week who they picked...Its actually been fairly easy to trust the Lord with this because I know there is nothing I can do!

I think that covers it, no silly dog mishaps to share this time.